This Mother’s Day is bittersweet.
I don´t get to celebrate with my mom like always (we would probably be running late to brunch right about now), but since she passed, she has been ever-so present in my life, and I am so thankful that I continue to feel her love and her spirit. I truly believe that if you pay attention closely, our loved ones in Heaven find a way to communicate with and live through us.
Never one to hold back or be shy, it would be just like her to make sure I know that she is with me on a weekly—even daily—basis. I often times picture her trying to nudge God aside so she can get front row access to my life:)
She seems to drop in and say hello just when I need her. After going through her belongings at her house (which was a Stephanie Museum with every photo, piece of paper, or tangible evidence of my life) and putting the last few items in my car, I was suddenly overcome with sadness. Then out of nowhere I noticed a blue bonnet, her favorite flower, sprouting up out of the weeds (yard work and gardening were never her thing). It was her saying hi and just reminding me that she is still with me.
Now, almost every time I am driving in my car, Aerosmith, the Stones, or Lenny Kravitz come on the radio. Of course she would try to communicate with me through music because that was her passion and biggest inspiration.
I also have a newfound love for Mick Jagger and the Rolling Stones. I used to get so irritated when she wanted me to watch another YouTube video of Mick Jagger after hours upon hours of obsessively analyzing him strut the stage. Now the Stones are my favorite band to listen to, and the other day I noticed an entire hour had gone by where I had watched videos of them performing some of their greatest hits live.
Yesterday, I woke up bummed about it being Mother´s Day weekend and not having her here, and then I got a call with some potentially good news. Upon hanging up, even better news: a letter from the UT Southwestern Transplant Center, saying that her tissue donations helped two ladies in their sixties restore their eyesight, in addition to the many other people who will benefit from her bone and tissue grafts. If you knew my mom, you know she had a heart the size of Texas and was one of the most giving people, so it fills my heart up with joy knowing that even though she is no longer with us on Earth, she continues to give and live through others.
If Mother’s Day is celebrated in Heaven today, I have a feeling there is quite the shindig happening. Aerosmith blaring on the juke box, Prince jamming out and doing toe touches (my mom always said she wanted to be able to do toe touches like him, in heels, nonetheless), Michael doing the moonwalk, Joey (my mom´s beloved dachshund) running wild without a leash, my mom dancing around, and everyone feasting on delicious food cooked up by the ultimate chef, my mom´s grandmother, Granny Marie.
I am so thankful for the many things that my one-of-a-kind mother has taught me: to be authentic, adventurous, carefree, and to love New York City, dachshunds, and classic rock. But today, I am especially thankful that she is living her greatest life in Heaven and that I get to witness how her beautiful and generous spirit live on.